On Track
On track- is a dynamic podcast that was created with the intent of providing guidance to listeners on exploring what a purpose-driven life requires.
Creating a community that is safe, loving, and healing for all that may be lost or may not understand the direction their life is headed. This space is where we dig further into our mind, body, and spirit figuring out our purpose God has intended for our life.
We will cultivate skills required not only to answer these questions, but also assist in navigating everyday obstacles.
We want to provide mentorship, showing vulnerability through personal experiences we've dealt with throughout our life and marriage, and speak with those of influence within our community.
Our Goal is to provide clarity through the storm, cultivate a healthy/ healing lifestyle, and continuing to move forward in the purpose God has provided YOU specifically!
This is our intention behind shepherding the community that's created, and these are the words behind our acronym in order to do so!
S.H.E.P.H.E.R.D
S - Safe
H - Hope
E - Equipping
P - Purpose
H - Healing
E - Encourage
R - Redirecting
D - Dependable
On Track
Salt and Light: How EQ Shapes Our Purpose
Ever wondered why some incredibly intelligent people struggle to connect with others or lead effectively? The missing piece might be emotional intelligence – a critical component for Christians seeking to fulfill their purpose.
Emotional intelligence (EQ) encompasses your ability to recognize and regulate emotions in yourself and others. While IQ measures your cognitive abilities and technical skills, EQ determines how well you navigate relationships, manage conflict, and influence those around you. As Brandon and Isabel break down in this fourth episode of their "Planning for Your Purpose" series, Jesus himself modeled the perfect balance – spending 30 years mastering his craft as a carpenter while demonstrating impeccable emotional intelligence in his relationships.
Daniel Goleman's framework divides emotional intelligence into four quadrants: self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, and relationship management. Each area contains specific skills Christians need to develop, from accurately assessing your own emotions to empathizing with others. These abilities don't just make you more effective professionally – they directly connect to Jesus's call for believers to be "salt and light" in the world. Without emotional intelligence, our attempts to disciple others and exhibit Christ-like leadership fall flat.
The hosts share personal examples of growth in these areas, from learning to identify emotions in real-time to navigating the complexities of ministry leadership. They emphasize how emotional regulation, transparency, and resilience all stem from a secure identity in Christ – setting up perfectly for their final episode in the series. Whether you're leading a ministry, raising a family, or simply wanting to make a greater impact for the Kingdom, this episode provides practical insights for growing your emotional intelligence and fulfilling your God-given purpose with excellence.
Ready to become more emotionally intelligent and effective in your calling? Listen now, then connect with us on Instagram @ontrack_official to continue the conversation about using emotional intelligence to live out your purpose.
Hey guys, welcome back to OnTrack Podcast with your hosts, brandon and Isabel Diamond.
Speaker 2:Hey y'all.
Speaker 1:We're coming at you from Tennessee.
Speaker 2:Tennessee. We're trying to adopt the accent.
Speaker 1:Although it's not great Nope, but today we'll be diving into our fourth episode of our five-part series Planning for your Purpose Emotional Intelligence. Anchoring various skills within these categories enables a greater ability to lead people, lead out what God has set before you.
Speaker 2:We encourage you to check out our Instagram at ontrack underscore official, and we hope you enjoy this week's episode when it comes to planning for your purpose, I think there's so many different categories that you wouldn't think to explore, but we're here to push you a little bit and just go down some rabbit holes, so definitely stick with us us being able to dissect these things.
Speaker 1:it's it's not only important for you, but it's important for us to continually reflect and I think that ties in with IQ and EQ and, yeah, that whole world of things of furthering introspection on so an arsenal of tools to navigate life.
Speaker 2:And that can be in the category of spiritual and allowing the Lord to do a lot within your heart, mind and soul. And then there's also other categories within being equipped, as a Christian, to navigate the battlefield that we're on, that we're on, and that comes with equipping ourselves through our educational background as well as our interpersonal ability to connect and relate to people, and I think the best example of this is Jesus. Right Jesus, I mean, what was his main craft that he did?
Speaker 1:Yeah, so Jesus was a carpenter for 30 plus years before he actually started to minister and spread the word and really be personal with people.
Speaker 2:Right, and so we're called, whatever it is, to operate with excellence and then on the same, you know, in the same frame. Jesus was also very personal and very emotionally in tune and able to connect with people and make people feel safe.
Speaker 1:Right and that is on the line with IQ, which was his craft and kind of the hard skill realm of things and as well, like Isabel said, he was really personable to really just want to share and spread peace, joy, all the things that come with following Christ.
Speaker 2:Right, and so, yeah, that's what this whole episode is about is just talking a little bit about IQ, just to differentiate the two, and then we'll dive into emotional intelligence and break that up, because, yeah, there's a lot that goes into that. Yeah, so iq, also known as the intelligence quotient, measures an individual's cognitive abilities, including problem solving skills, logical reasoning and the ability to analyze complex information. It was, um, yeah, coined in the early 20th century to predict academic potential, and there's actually like an iq test. You can google online and you know, don't beat yourself up if you have a low iq score. Um, there's just continual growth, no matter where you stand. Um, yeah, and then, yeah, a high iq can be beneficial in roles requiring technical mastery, innovation and the ability to learn complex concepts quickly. Yeah, I mean. Why, again, why is IQ important?
Speaker 1:Goldman hypothesized that EQ is actually more important than traditional intelligence quotient IQ in leadership and other important areas of character development. Even with the remarkably high IQ, individuals with lower EQ on average experience less success, and I think that's just a testament of how important emotional intelligence truly is, and I think that's why we would just want to tease it apart and focus more on that today.
Speaker 2:Right, and you can also replace the term success with leadership. Studies have also shown that those with a high eq are often managers and carry roles within organizations that, yeah, just have more authority just because you're able to relate and lead people a lot better. Um, so, yeah, I guess, all to say, that we want to really focus on EQ because, within the scope of operating within your purpose and planning accordingly, you're likely going to be interacting with a lot of different kinds of people, um, people as we make disciples and as we pour into people and love on people, like Jesus does, and so we really want to be able to self-evaluate and grow in this area so that we can better steward what God's called us to do.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so diving into EQ, emotional quotient EQ, also referred to as emotional intelligence, focuses on individuals' ability to understand, manage and utilize emotions in oneself and others. It encompasses four key areas coined by Daniel Goleman, as we had mentioned previous, and so he basically created a chart that Isabel is going to begin to dissect for us, and we'll tease it apart and, yeah, just jump further into that.
Speaker 2:Right. So Goman basically created a visual illustration. It has four quadrants and basically breaks up emotional intelligence, with emotional intelligence being at the center, and then five components of that surrounding emotional intelligence are self-awareness, motivation, social skills, empathy and self-regulation. And then, expanding from that center point, we have the four quadrants. The top left is self-awareness, to the right of that is social awareness, right below that is relationship management and then the bottom left is self management. And so we'd love to tease these apart with y'all so that you have a better understanding of what emotional intelligence really encompasses and how we can grow in that.
Speaker 1:Yeah. So starting with the top left quadrant self-awareness, we're going to tease that apart even further, beginning with emotional self-awareness and your ability to feel and understand the emotions you feel towards situations, circumstances. It's really important that you're able to identify specific emotions in any given scenario or situation.
Speaker 2:Right, and I think this is something that we've definitely grown in, even in our relationship. I mean, I guess you can recall when we first started dating. Sometimes I would ask you like, oh, how are you feeling in this given moment?
Speaker 1:It was absolutely kaput. I just said nothing.
Speaker 2:And you're like, oh, I need to think about it and get back to you. And then now, if I'm like, oh, how are you doing right now? Then you'd be able to like quickly identify and say this is how I'm feeling and this is why I'm feeling this way. And that just comes with the ability to really hone in on emotional self-awareness.
Speaker 1:And honestly, vulnerability with yourself is really important within emotional self-awareness. And honestly, vulnerability with yourself is really important within emotional self-awareness, because if you're not able to confront your emotions head on, then you're not going to be able to identify specifically what you're feeling.
Speaker 2:Right, and that goes into accurate self-assessment, which is another element within the quadrant of self-awareness.
Speaker 1:And again, vulnerability is key in being able to accurately assess yourself.
Speaker 2:Right, and I think that's challenging because you know, on one side of the coin, you know, studies show that people are really good at self-deprecation. But that's also not an accurate evaluation of yourself, and so you have to be really careful to say, okay, this is where I am authentically and I don't need to sugarcoat anything, and I also don't need to put an atomic bomb on top of it and make myself feel worse off.
Speaker 1:um, self-affirmation is really important yes, because 90 of thoughts that we think are negative, and we need to begin to turn those thoughts around and really just feed ourself positive affirmation to hone in on all the different skill sets we possess to increase our potential mentally right. And then that goes into the third subsection of self-awareness, which is self-confidence skill sets we possess to increase our potential mentally Right.
Speaker 2:And then that goes into the third subsection of self-awareness, which is self-confidence Right. And how do you even begin to grow in self-confidence?
Speaker 1:Beginning in self-confidence is understanding what scripture and what God says about you and understanding your identity in Christ, which is the next episode, and we're so excited to speak about that, but I think that's ultimately where it begins, because it's hard to have confidence within yourself when the enemy is just trying to feed you these untruthful lies and thoughts and feelings about yourself.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's true, and I think it's valuable just to continue to reference scripture throughout this whole exploration of emotional intelligence, to really anchor yourself on what is the truth, so that when you do self-evaluate, when you do grow in self-confidence, when you grow in emotional self-awareness, it's all coming from the right place that's good so what is the next quadrant? Let's stay on the self side, so right below self-awareness. Um, what? What does self-management entail?
Speaker 1:yeah, so next is going to be self-management, as she said, and the first thing in which we talked about last episode is self-control and how self-control is super important within emotional intelligence, because if we don't have self-control, then we're not able to really gauge a fair assessment within ourself.
Speaker 2:Or even regulate right. Regulate your emotions and this was a topic that we even dove into when we were dating, of emotional regulation and what that looked like in our relationship. Because I think something I noticed off the bat with Brandon was that, regardless of the situation whether or not the day wasn't going that well or there was something catastrophic that he's processing he was always able to regulate his emotions in such a way where they stayed healthfully confined, not in a negative sense, but they just didn't go haywire, like he was never explosive or any of that kind of thing, and so I think that's also displayed within Jesus's character. You know, even when he was beaten and put on a cross and crucified, like he withheld and held back because he knew his identity and he knew what God was calling him to and he had wisdom that was far beyond anyone's comprehension at that time.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so again, with self-control and self-regulating your emotions, it's important to also be transparent and healthfully deal with those emotions. And that's where the Lord comes in is we're able to really healthfully regulate our emotions and be transparent with what we're feeling, especially with the Lord. You can have those people you can find in, but if you're able to really be transparent and honest and upfront with the lord, then you're able to more easily be transparent with others and be able to convey better messages and articulate more accurately of what you're feeling, um, and the lord already knows your heart, so it's not you shouldn't, um be hesitant to speak your mind and speak um what's going on within your heart. And I think it's just first understanding self-awareness, because then you're able to really manage those emotions and feelings and thoughts more accurately and more truthfully not only with yourself, but with God, and then leading to others.
Speaker 2:That's really good, and I think that also highlights the idea that we don't keep anything in the dark, like anything kept in the dark is basically accessible to work right, accessible for the enemy to to mess around with, and so anything that's brought to light is not held captive and the lord can work in and through that, and so I feel like bringing things to light and transparency can go hand in hand. And then the third component of self-management is adaptability, and adaptability is an incredible skill to possess, because you're able to ebb and flow within any social environment, and that's great for managing people, because when a lot of people are under your wing, you're going to come across so many different personalities, even within ministry.
Speaker 1:Yeah, when Isabel worked for a church that we had one to in San Diego, it was just the coolest thing to see the way she ebb and flowed and the way she was so adaptable to any circumstance or situation, because it required of her a level-headed approach in terms of managing so many different people, like like she had mentioned, and she did such a phenomenal job at that and it's a really important skill to possess, as she had mentioned, and it's just seen so apparent, apparent within her that's sweet of you to say, yeah, I think it's something that anyone and everyone should continue to grow in um, because, yeah, ministry can be a little bit messy, and so if you're able to um adapt appropriately within circumstances, then everyone can be attended to appropriately.
Speaker 2:And then what's the fourth?
Speaker 1:Yeah, Adaptability is able to also allow you to have a more resilient, resilient heart. And that's the that's the fourth one is resiliency.
Speaker 2:Yeah, um, I think we've touched on resiliency quite a bit throughout the episodes.
Speaker 2:In general, when we talk about planning and moving in the direction that God's called you to go, you really have to be resilient, you have to be persistent, you have to anchor in and know what it is that you're heading towards.
Speaker 2:And that's a general framework scope of emotional intelligence. You know, emotions can be really really sticky to navigate and hard to carry, especially within management or within ministry. It's like how do I, how do I attend to people but not carry their emotions on top of my emotions, and how do I make sure that this doesn't impact me negatively? You know, there's just a lot of you know doesn't impact me negatively. You know there's just a lot of, you know, placing emotions in the appropriate bucket, so to speak, and within that there's a lot of resiliency to maintain your own emotional health while also attending to other people's emotional needs. And so you are going to experience a little bit of resistance in that category, but that's ultimately just going to experience a little bit of resistance in that category, um, but that's ultimately just going to allow you to grow overall in your ability to um emote, so to speak.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's really good Um, and that's a good transition to the social um side of things. And the first quadrant on the right is going to be social awareness and beginning with empathy and I know you're empathetic, isabel. What does that mean?
Speaker 2:Yeah, Brandon, you're empathetic as well and that's something that's been really sweet. If you find an empath, definitely consider marrying them, as long as they're healthy and pursuing the Lord. But yeah, empathy is just being able to feel what other people are feeling, even if you haven't experienced it yourself, and making people feel like, yeah, you see them, you hear them, you feel things with them and that they're not alone. And it falls within the scope of social and recognition, because within you know people interacting you're going to need to quickly identify other people's emotions. So in the previous quadrants it was like how do I identify my own emotions? But now we're like, okay, how do we now hone in on other people's emotions?
Speaker 2:And this comes with practice and through observation and also through your innate ability to feel what other people are feeling. And again, sometimes this comes more naturally to some people that are deeper feelers. Some people lean a little bit on the thinker side, which is also incredible. But again, we're exercising all of these different wheelhouses so that we can continue to just be more Christ-like. But yeah, empathy is incredible and it definitely takes a lot of time, just through hearing people's stories and growing in friendships with people and providing space for people to open up to you and providing space for people to open up to you. So why don't you help us understand what organizational awareness looks like, which is the second subsection under social awareness.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so with organizational awareness, it's basically involving the ability to understand and navigate the dynamics, unwritten rules, power relationships and emotional currents within an organization, within a ministry, within your job. Basically just understanding the things that are going to allow you the ability to have an upper hand at understanding those above and below you.
Speaker 2:Right, and just the structural components of the environment that you're working in, yeah, which also aids in your ability to lead, because you're more aware, right and this might be a category within emotional intelligence that maybe you hadn't thought about but just that general overarching awareness of the interpersonal relationships between your coworkers and the way that the environment operates and the environment you're creating as a leader all plays within the success of not only your role but the roles of those around you.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I don't know if this necessarily leads into community service, but that's the next one. Yeah, community service is a great way to get plugged into those around you and really understand those that are advocating for certain things. Community service is ever evolving and something that is able to be done wherever you go, but where we see it most is within church, and just the volunteer opportunities that are out there are incredible and can really help towards your social awareness and recognition within your own emotional growth, within your own emotional growth.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's great and it's also very practical as well. And then the last quadrant, the bottom right, is relationship management, which focuses on social and regulation. So the first one within relationship management is conflict management, um or other people call it conflict resolution, and it's just honestly, the ability to to navigate conflict healthfully with the people around you, to not brush things under a rag or to not um break off relationships because you can't resolve um disputes, but it's a way to acknowledge the differences between two people and to make amends, make peace, come to a resolution. And this ability is highly reliant on emotional intelligence and your ability to monitor the other person's feelings, the other person's needs, why they're feeling the way that they are, your own ability to process the situation at hand and then to come to a resolution.
Speaker 1:So it is a little ability to be an example for those around us and those that we're continually operating with on a day-to-day basis, whether that's with work, with school, in church. It allows us the ability to raise ourselves up as small leaders, to then move into that next level, to lead a larger group of people.
Speaker 2:And set that example and that leads us into developing others. We talk about discipleship a lot on this podcast and this is a perfect example of that. It's really hard to build up other people around you and point them to the Lord without the ability or without the skill set of emotional intelligence. And leading yourself and leading yourself, and that goes into influence within relationship management. You have a lot of influence on other people and ideally positive influence, and influence that will paint a picture of what it looks like to be a Christian.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and the other two are going to be building bonds and teamwork and collaboration. We're not going to really jump into those today. So what does this all mean? Why are we even talking about emotional intelligence and why are we talking about IQ, EQ? What does this help us towards planning our purpose?
Speaker 2:Right. Well, as Christians, we are called to be the salt and the light of the world, and so what that means is going. So what I mean by that is in Matthew 5-7,. So, as Christians, we are called to be the salt and light of the world, and we see this concept in the Sermon of the Mount found in Matthew 5-7. In the Sermon of the Mount found in Matthew, chapters 5 through 7, jesus used the metaphors of salt and light to describe his followers' role in the world. Being the salt of the earth means preserving goodness and influencing the world positively, while being the light of the world means illuminating the truth and guiding others towards righteousness. Essentially, christians are called to be a transformative force impacting the world around them through their actions and faith. And in order to emulate this and step into this and really anchor this, it's really important to grow in emotional intelligence and to grow in all these subsections, because these are the nuances that really enable us to shine brighter and be saltier.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and it really allows us to lead people well in creating more of a small town perspective on life and really being personable with those around us on a daily basis. I think it's really important that we recognize that this world is only as good as we make it, with Christ at the center of our lives and with the connections and networks that we create and networks that we create. And, yeah, it's just really beautiful to see a flourishing community that is loving on one another and continuing to lead one another down a path that is righteous and aligns with Christ's values.
Speaker 2:That's a great place to end. Yeah, we just want to thank you all for tuning in to this week's episode where we discussed EQ versus IQ. We dove into why these topics sow into planning for your purpose and the long-term value that comes with growing as a leader in Christ. Stay tuned for next week where we will wrap up our five-week series on the topic of identity, and don't forget to check out our Instagram at ontrack underscore official. We hope you have such an incredible week y'all.